On The Fear Of Embarassment

We fear to be considered many a thing. Unattractive. Wierd. Naive. Immature. Stupid.

Whichever trait we value most in others, that is the trait that we fear losing most. (If we believe that we did not possess the said trait in the first place, then we fear demonstrating the absence of the said trait.)

This fear is more commonly expressed as the fear of embarrassing oneself.

But what do we really fear when we say that we are afraid of embarrassing ourselves? 

Our greatest fear is that we will behave in a way that will deem us not only unlovable, but simply unacceptable to the wider human race (or at least the people whose opinion matters to us).

In order to overcome this fear, one must realise two things.

Firstly, the fact that there is no single definition of “intelligence”, “beauty”, “maturity”, “kindness” or more broadly “goodness”. What one person, in one time frame, in one context considers to be intelligent/beautiful/mature/kind/good, another person, in another time frame, in another context, might consider to be the complete opposite.

Secondly, a human being has a certain degree of inherent worth that they cannot be robbed of. Even though some people may lead you to believe that you have lost this worth, this does not change your worth; your worth remains unchanged even as your opinion of yourself, as well as other people’s opinion of you, fluctuates.

You are worthy of happiness and love simply because you are alive and it is only once we realise our inherent worth that we can become our true selves.


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